Change

I Hate when i do this to myself, I always try to base my life on everyone around me. My Exboyfriend is doing so much with his life. My Friends are all doing great things for themselves. Im not I never seem to go forward in my life. Some people tell me that i give them inspiration because i throw caution to the wind. I take chances and i do crazy things that nobody has the balls to do. Chongo keeps asking when im leaving like i have this pattern of packing up and moving away. I dont have a pattern but i do move alot. Ive been doing it since i was a kid. I guess its another way of me keeping myself from getting hurt anyone then i do. Im tired of moving im tired running away. Me moving away is like turing my back on my friends and im tired of hurting them, it also sucks that i make great friends but never get to keep them. I guess it goes to show me that i can make friends and that i can find the trust that i never give people.I have Dreams and i can never find a way to full fill them, but i hope this time i can do something about it. See i start writing one of theses blogs and i start out good and i lose my steam, i guess being a writer is out of the question since it seems i cant. i started watching charlieissocoollike videos and now im on pussycat dolls and when i grow i want to have boobies, wait anyways i know i wont be getting any bloggies with my blog but at least the 7 of my readers can have some sort of random ramble of a blog to read.