In back; for now

So I havent been posting on here latley. I just have been in such a mood. So im going to fill in my 5's of readers. Ive become such a crabby hermit. I go to work and then i come home and i sit on facebook. I dont get invited out and I dont have many friends. My major problem is I dont trust anyone. The few people that I have friended have been 2 faced. There not all bad but you know what im not in this world to please everyone, the most i can hope for is a smile every now and again.

Im still haveing issues with my roomate, but she dosent even know. I know i may sound like a dick or an asshole. But what is wrong with a "Thank You" or a "blesh You." Mabe its a texas thing cause i rarely hear it. She beleaves that being gay is a choice because that is how she was raised. Shes never asked me if i "choose" to be gay. She gets mad when people say interracial couples souldnt get married but dosent beleave that I should be allowed to get married. Im from Cali were people think the same thing, but you have no rights to tell me what to do, cause if you think you have a right to tell me how to live my life then i have a list for you. (this is a Tangent and not nessaserly about my Rommie).

I love my roomie and her famly but when you say something to me that hurts me and emotionaly scares me and then blame it on "thats how i was raised." what makes you think I want to be in a place were I know everyone is looking at me with judgment in their eyes and in their minds. My mother Raised me, but i still have my own opinions, and regardless of what she was raised she sees me as her son and i do hope that she loves me. I know my sisters love me no matter what I am, Hell I think they may love me more as a gay man then a straight boy.

I am not one to hide my feelings especially if im asked (by the way you clicking on the link and reading this was of your own free will so yes you asked) but i was betrayed by one of the friends i spoke of earlier. I wrote an opinion of mine and sent it to coworkers for the feed back someone who was not included print said writing out and gave it to her. Fine im not betrayed by the act but by the lies. I talked to the co worker and she was mad but understood that what i wrote was exactly what i have said to her person to person. ( heres the thing, they didnt get that i was talking about another coworker and used the first co worker as my opening sentence)( its hard to do this without names).Im not going to post anything that has not already been said.

Now ill be going home in August and im scared. All of my friends are too busy with their own lives and here i am again a grown ass man starting over from scratch. Nuff Said.